She's tired of getting pushed around
It's a long way up when you're on the ground

The pain comes in waves. One moment you're fine, and you start thinking 'oh, this did not go as bad as I thought, I feel much better now!'. And then comes this sudden ache, even if you are not thinking about it in that moment, and you know what the ache is about, you just don't know what to do with it. How to get rid of it. No matter what you're doing at that time, no matter who you're with, when it comes, it hurts. And you feel fucking lonely even being in a crowd of the best people in the world. But you continue to smile, to react to the outside world, being aware of the big empty hole inside of you. You know that in a while (an hour, maybe a few, or maybe a day - it differs) you will feel fine again and you will think that maybe you're okay now, maybe the end of your suffering is finally here and you feel strong enough to move on and forget. Guess what? It's a trap. Because the wave will come again and crash you.