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Rob: “We were doing the last bit of the shoot, and there were these people who were waiting outside the perimeter of the set on the desert. And this one woman handed her baby, who was three months old, to an A.D. to meet us. But the A.D. didn’t really know what to do with it. So he was thinking like, ‘I think she wants you to sign the baby or something.’ So I take it and everyone was like, ‘I don’t want to sign the baby.’ Oh no she wanted pictures with the baby! And I didn’t really understand the reality of the situation at that point, that anyone would actually see this picture. And so I was like, ‘There’s a picture somewhere on the internet of me biting this baby.’

Kristen: “You bit the baby?”

Rob: “Yeah.”

Kristen: “That’s so weird.”

Rob: “I didn’t actually like, touch it. But like, it’s kind of a funny picture. This baby is so young its entire head fits in my mouth.”

Kristen: “I’m sure that’s not true.”

Rob: [laughs] “If you look at the picture…”

Kristen Stewart outfit - Mulberry Fashion Show.

“You think I lifted a van off you?” His tone questioned my sanity, but it only made more suspicious. It was like a perfectly delivered line by a skilled actor.I merely nodded once, jaw tight. “Nobody will believe that, you know”. His voice held an edge of derision now. “I’m not going to tell anybody.” I said each word slowly, carefully controlling my anger. Surprise flitted across his face. “Then why does it matter?” “It matters to me, ” I insisted. “I don’t like to lie- so there’d better be a good reason why I’m doing it.” “Can’t you just thank me and get over it?” “Thank you.” I waited, fuming and expectant. “You’re not going to let it go, are you?” “No.” “In that case… I hape you enjoy disappointment.”

“His liquid topaz eyes were penetrating — trying futilely, I assumed, to lift the truth straight from my mind.”