" I’ve blamed her for all of this , for leaving, for ruining me. And maybe that was the seed of it, but from that one little seed grew this tumor of a flowering plant. And I’m the one who nurtures it. I water it. I care for it. I nibble from its poison berries. I let it wrap around my neck, choking the air right out of me. I’ve done that. All by myself. All to myself."

“I get it now.
I have to make good on my promise. To let her go. To really let her go.
To let us both go.”

A day might be just twenty-four hours but sometimes getting through just one seems as impossible as scaling Everest.”

There are so many things that demand to be said. ‘Where did you go? Do you ever think about me? You’ve ruined me. Are you okay?’ But of course, I can’t say any of that.”

But I’d do it again. I know that now. I’d make that promise a thousand times over and lose her a thousand times over to have heard her play last night or to see her in the morning sunlight. Or even without that. Just to know that she’s somewhere out there. Alive .

“Letting go. Everyone talks about it like it’s the easiest thing. Unfurl your fingers one by one until your hand is open.”

“ I needed to hate someone and you’re the one I love the most, so it fell on you.”

“You were so busy trying to be my savior that you left me all alone.”

Her hands were freezing, just like they always were, so I warmed them, just like I always did. ”

“And then Adam Wilde shows up at Carnegie Hall on the biggest night of my career, and it felt like more than a coincidence. It felt like a gift. From them. For my first recital ever, they gave me a cello. And for this one, they gave me you. ”

— Gayle Forman in Where She Went