you know these moments, when it hurts, and you try to control yourself, and you bite your lip to act normal and not to kill somebody accidently.

if things were a little bit different, i would go out, sit in front of my house, and smoke a good cigarette. i wouldnt even cry i guess. i know exactly why people smoke. every sigarette equals 15 tears. i have an experience. people smoke when they are tired of crying. people smoke when they dont know what to do. people smoke when they dont know what to believe in or who to believe. people smoke because.. because its another way to let it go, let the feelings go. no matter what it is - love, hate, it kinda helps. for sometime. i dont smoke. i cry. and yea. ill change.