Barney: Stay with me. Here it comes to me. Ha, okay, here's the point. You thought that Mary was a short thing, right? So what happened? She took you up to a hotel room on the first date. All you have to do is be that confident with every girl you meet and your slap's over.

Ted: So the message is, I should treat every woman like a whore?

Barney: Come on, dude, you should be thanking me.

Ted: She slapped me and stormed off!

Barney: Can you blame her? You called her a hooker.