Fuck everything that makes me unhappy. These pictures of my dad, that I found today. I hate myself for being so vulnerabale, even through these 15 years, I love him. I still love him. Yeah I know, he left us, but fuck all of this, I need him. I can't stand myself for crying so much. I hate, that I can't tell anyone what I feel. I can't tell it to my mother, 'cause she has already gone through a lot of disgusting things, I can't tell this to any of my friend, they will not understand me. I'm even writing all of this in English, idk why, but I do this. I've tell myself: "Don't cry!" a thousand times, but I can't fucking stop the tears.