"Oh, look at you lot. You're all so vacant. Is it nice not being me? It must be so relaxing. "
-- Sherlock
" Dear God, what is it like in your funny little brains? It must be so boring! "
-- Sherlock
" I'm not a psychopath, I'm a highly functioning sociopath. Do your research. "
-- Sherlock (to Anderson)
" We've got a serial killer! Love those, there's always something to look forward to. "
-- Sherlock
" Mrs Hudson took my skull. "
-- Sherlock
Donovan: "Are these human eyes? "
Sherlock: "Put those back! "
Donovan: "They were in the microwave! "
Sherlock: "It's an experiment! "
Sherlock: "Shut up. "
Lestrade: "I didn't say anyth-- "
Sherlock: "You were thinking. It's annoying. "
" Anderson, don't talk out loud, you lower the IQ of the entire street. "
-- Sherlock
Sherlock: "Shut up everybody, shut up! Don't move, don't speak, don't breathe, I'm trying to think. Anderson, face the other way, you're putting me off. "
Anderson: "What, my face is? "
Lestrade: "Everyboody, quiet. Anderson, turn your back. "
Anderson: "Oh, for God's sake… "
Lestrade: "Your back! Now, please! "
John: "That…was amazing. "
Sherlock: "Do you think so? "
John: "Of course it was, it was extraordinary. It was quite extraordinary. "
Sherlock: "That's not what people normally say. "
John: "What do people normally say? "
Sherlock: "Piss off. "
John: "That's fantastic! "
Sherlock: "Do you know you do that out loud? "
John: "Sorry, I'll shut up. "
Sherlock: "No, it's… fine. "
John: "You have a girlfriend? "
Sherlock: "Girls not really my area. "
John: "Oh…so do you have a boyfriend? Which is fine. "
Sherlock: "I know it's fine. "
John: "So you have a boyfriend. "
Sherlock: "No. "
John: "Oh, okay. So you're unattatched then. Just like me. Fine, good. "
Sherlock: "… John, erm… I think you should know that I consider myself married to my work, and while I'm flattered I'm not really looking for any-- "
John: "No, no, that's not what I… no! I'm just saying… it's all fine. "
Sherlock: "… Good. Thank you. "
" The game, Mrs Hudson, is on. "
-- Sherlock
Sherlock: "A friend? "
John: "Well, an enemy. "
Sherlock: "Oh! Which one? "
John: "Where did you get this? Detective Inspector Lestrade? "
Sherlock: "I pickpocket him when he's annoying. "
" We can't giggle, it's a crime scene. "
-- John
John: "This is how you get your kicks, isn't it? You risk your life to prove you're clever. "
Sherlock: "Why would I do that? "
John: "Because you're an idiot. "
" And since yesterday you've moved in with him and now you're solving crimes together. Might we expect a happy announcement by the end of the week? "
-- Mycroft
Sherlock: "If you were dying, if you were murdered, in the very last seconds, what would you say? "
John: "Please God, let me live. "
Sherlock: "Use your imagination. "
John: "I don't have to. "
" Look, I'm in shock, I have a blanket. "
-- Sherlock