1- Jacob is alive. Edward is dead.
2- Jacob is warm and cuddly. Edward is an ice cube. He has to cuddle on top of the sheet just so Bella doesn’t freeze.
3- Jacob is happy and smiles all the time. Edward is moodier than a PMSing adolescent.
4- Jacob listens to Bella and compromises. Edward decides what’s good for her and dictates.
5- Jacob makes Bella happy. Edward makes Bella anxious, stupid, and obsessive.
6- Jacob and Bella have equal power in their relationship. Edward has all the power.
7- Jacob made Bella sad and confused for two weeks. Edward made Bella feel rejected and suicidally depressed for months.
8- It takes Jacob one day to apologize for making Bella miserable. It takes Edward most of a year and a whole lot of drama.
9- Bella loves Jacob for his sunny personality. Bella loves Edward cuz he smells good and looks “pretty”.
10- Jacob and Bella’s age difference is two years. Edward’s is one hundred (wtf?).
11- Jacob can turn into a wolf. All Edward can do is sparkle.
12- Who honestly likes kissing a statue? They’re too cold, stiff, unresponsive, and just plain hard.
13- Jacob is perfect because he isn’t perfect. Edward is too perfect.
14- Jacob has a pimped out motorcycle. All Edward has is a stupid shiny Volvo.
15- Jacob is hilarious. Edward is just plain boring. (too cliché ;)