ugh

this is just so much of a problem rn bc i know i never really go for it bc once i did and got rejected and that's probably the reason why i never even try

and like

all the phonecalls i would have to make and all the meetings i would have to go on

just no

but i do want my life to be something good and ofc i'm thinking about it only bc i'm watching greek and ashleigh doesnt have a job i mean srsly that's the basis of this problem

i want my life to be good and productive and ~achievementfull (and yes that's not a word who cares?)

i'm just afraid that i will be nowhere by the end of uni and i fear that so hard

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w/e

i'm just gonna have this thing bc i do need the place to write my mind off somewhere

and it's in english so that if anyone finds me they probably won't be able to get it

yes good

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