Игра разгоняется. Каждый новый факт опровергает предыдущий. Каждая новая попытка узнать опаснее другой. Каждый новый взгляд — насмешливый, колкий, из-под закрученных не по-женски ресниц — распаляет, раскручивает спираль. Нужно что-то сделать, шевельнуться, написать все ответы, взять себя в руки. Возьми меня в руки. Я не скажу так. Я не скажу правду, я не испорчу игру. Я моргну, чтобы стряхнуть морок, тянущий из-под этих ресниц. «Тянущий» — вот слово.

Я подожду, посмотрю, понаблюдаю под пристальным насмешливым взглядом. Я отмечу все красные флаги, чтобы сразу же их проигнорировать.

Я буду врать, но только не себе. Но если ты испортишь игру, если ты соврешь себе…карма. Пепел.

Зачем ты говоришь про дилера? Зачем ты кладёшь голову мне на плечо? Зачем ты оставляешь открытый телефон с саднящими чатами? Зачем ты говоришь о том, что нравится мне?

I check it, I wreck it, I turn it around

I gave you all my money, gave you all my money

Gave you all my money, gave you all my money

I don’t wanna live

I don’t wanna give you nothing

’Cause you never give me nothing back

Why can’t you be good for something?

Not one shirt off your back

Why can’t you be good for something?

Not one shirt off your back

Please don’t try to find me through my dealer

He won’t pick up his phone

Please don’t try my doctor either

He won’t take any calls

He’s no fucking spirit healer

He just can’t stop to talk

But he’s gone now for the weekend

#писатель а #дневник а #мысли #чувства

It was never supposed to become a tradition or anything of the kind, really. It was just Wei Ying, just the first snow, the giddy feeling of it landing on your coat and open palms, melting instantly. But it did. Now, it’s him, the first snow, and the river bank. And the stranger.

Wei Ying has taken to coming to the river to watch the snow land and stifle the city that he has made his home. His, and A-Yuan’s, who is at home now, undeniably plastered to the window of his bedroom with their cat, watching the snow in the headlights of the passing cars. It’s Sunday, the day tellingly gloomy and lead-coloured. Wei Ying’s head knew about the upcoming snow before any forecast did, which still failed. It predicted snow for tomorrow, but it’s happening today already. A-Yuan thought it was ash from the bonfires at first.

Wei Ying is restless against the fencing, the carton tray he brought along is at his knees, resting on the fencing’s platform. It’s nearing five, he can’t feel his hands and nose, but Wei Ying tells himself that he’ll come. If he doesn’t – well. Maybe next year.

He busies himself with watching the snowflakes, or rather graupel, disappear once it reaches the surface. Water to water, stark white into the welcoming darkness of the same kin. It fits the city. It fits Wei Ying. Sometimes he envies the snowflakes. Sometimes he’s the river.

Despite it being the weekend, there’s no one around, because the wind is unforgiving and slashing. The nature invites to join its slumber, and Wei Ying almost did, with A-Yuan and Ghost tucked in on both sides. But he has a plan, a wish, a need to quench. Perhaps the snow will help.

Wei Ying nervously glances at his watch – it’s ten past five, tsks, turns his head and – the stranger is here, watching the snow exactly how Wei Ying’s been for the past hour. He doesn’t fidget – he never does, according to Wei Ying’s scanty data collected over three years. Wei Ying gulps, hands clenching into fists. His palms are clammy and ice-cold, but it doesn’t matter. He won’t disturb the stranger with them, he just wants to say hi.

The man is standing two spans down, the flaps of his grey coat hitting his legs. Wei Ying draws a breath. He wills his hands to cooperate, picks up the tray, and strides up to the stranger. Wei Ying is never shy about meeting new people, approaching them. With this man, it’s different. Wei Ying doesn’t know why, and it makes him quietly unsettled. Perhaps it will end today.

The man doesn’t turn as Wei Ying comes up to his side, and Wei Ying gives himself three hysterical seconds to realise that the man is gorgeous, even just one side of his face, taller than him, and completely expressionless. Still, he looks stern. Cold, like the river.

“Hi, ” Wei Ying manages, and coughs once to clear his stupid throat. “Hi, ” he repeats, brighter. The man turns to him slightly, still expressionless, which is fine, Wei Ying can work with that.

“I, uh, see you here watching the first snow every year, three years, actually. Me too.” Wei Ying’s heart leaps into his throat as the man turns to him with his whole body. Heavens, how can someone be so beautiful. If he fails, Wei Ying can’t even fling himself into the river from embarrassment.

“I am aware, ” the man says, and Wei Ying’s brain screeches to a halt.

“Oh, ” Wei Ying blurts out, and at least his cheeks start thawing from the blush. So the man has been watching him too.

“I’m Wei Ying, not a creep. I just wanted to say hi! And, ” Wei Ying points down with his chin. “I have coffee. And tea! I didn’t know what you like. I got both.”

The man inclines his head, gaze dropping to eye the tray. Wei Ying swears his brows twitch. Is that how he frowns?

“It’s freezing today, so I thought, ” Wei Ying cuts himself off. He didn’t really think that much, he just barreled into the coffee shop and ordered. “There’s a black coffee, a green tea, fruity, also black, and a cappuccino. Deflated, but, ” he shrugs, the warming talismans flapping on the wind. “If you’d like something else, I can get it! Just say the word, it’s not that far away. I just wanted to, ” Wei Ying parrots, desperate.

The man looks up at him, then down at the tray, then at him again. Wei Ying can’t feel his fingers, but he must be maiming the carton.

“Green tea, please, ” the man says, and Wei Ying breaks into a ready grin.

“Sure! I have sugar packets, in case you need them.”

Now, Wei Ying hasn’t thought of the logistics that well, so sue him.

“Ah, can you?” he says, and the man readily takes the tray from him. He’s wearing gloves, Wei Ying feels. “Thank you! Sorry, I can’t do it one-handed, I’d just spill everything.”

“Mn.”

Wei Ying blushes violently. He tears the talismans from two cups, snatches the green tea one out of its nest, the cappuccino for himself, and ta-das victoriously. “Sugar?"

The man shakes his head. "Thank you."

Wei Ying smiles at him. Something in him unspools. The snow helps.

Wei Ying takes the tray back, hands the cup to the stranger, and lets the warmth from his cappuccino seep into his skin. He watches the snowflakes land on the man’s coat, on his dark hair, on his nose and lashes, melting. Wei Ying looks away, aware of his indecent staring.

He puts the tray on the platform – A-Yuan will enjoy the tea – and turns to the river. The ripples are soothing, nudged by the wind. The snow is growing stronger, the day darker, his trainers slippery on the wet pavement.

They keep silent, and Wei Ying is okay with that. More than just okay, if he’s being honest.

“Your hands are cold, ” he hears amidst the whirlpool of his thoughts. He turns around.

“Huh?”

The stranger is done with tea, it seems, and he watches Wei Ying’s blisteringly red hands. “Your hands. You are cold.”

Wei Ying shrugs. “It’s fine.”

The man inserts his cup into the tray and takes his gloves off, which –

“No, it’s fine, no need! I never carry gloves, and A-Yuan always scolds me for it, but even if I do, I always forget to wear them, or I lose them, so I never even carry gloves."

The man takes Wei Ying’s cup next.

“You can lose them, ” he says, taking Wei Ying by the wrist and shoving his hand into the glove. It’s fuzzy on the inside and treacherously warm. Wei Ying’s stomach lurches from the touch of fingers on his skin.

“Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

It’s first snow again, late this year – it’s December already. It’s Wednesday, past Lan Zhan’s bedtime, but it’s snowing, so he made amendments. Wei Ying unscrews a thermos with tea, while Lan Zhan holds out two cups. The tea steams in the cold. Wei Ying is wearing Lan Zhan’s gloves, ultimately too big for him, but he refuses to wear another pair. Any of the three pairs Lan Zhan had bought him.

“You should have worn a hat, ” Lan Zhan says, ever the worrywart. “Your hair will get wet.”

"If i get sick, you’ll kiss it away."

Lan Zhan hums his assent, and takes the thermos from Wei Ying.

The river is already hidden under a thin layer of ice, almost translucent. The snow is soft and slow, like an early morning kiss.

Lan Zhan hugs him from the back, warm, familiar. The river bank is empty, people getting warm elsewhere, on the night of the first snow.

Wei Ying is shivering in the embrace, overwhelmed and grateful. More snowflakes in the tea, on his gloved hands, on Lan Zhan’s hair.

Wei Ying watches the river. He doesn’t feel like it anymore.

Спрашиваю: "А это не палевно?"; К. отвечает: "А ты от кого палишься?". И действительно. Когда я была студенткой, я думала, что легко даются хулиганские радости жизни типа настойки в разливайке в полдень или внезапного ночного бухича. Сейчас я не понимаю, как такое возможно, - я планирую изменения состояния сознания на месяц вперед - и дико респектую всем, кто сами себе хозяева. Мой хозяин - зарплата. Возможно, разгульный образ жизни - слабое мерило свободы, но лично я была нетрезвая в свои самые свободные времена, так как духом слабая раба божия Елизавета, в чем и кается.

Посмотрела "Ассу", так как идет в кино, а дома я бы 145 минут не выдержала. Внимание, спойлеры. Больше всего запомнилась комната Бананана с железным занавесом на входе (буквально), К. сказал, что это полностью перенесенная комната Тимура Новикова. Я думаю, что, если бы этот фильм шел 100 минут, то был бы шедевром, но еще я думаю, что, если мне наконец-то попадется счастливый билет в транспорте, то моя жизнь счастливо обернется, потому что уже давно не попадается, а раньше мне очень на них везло. То есть я презираю свое мнение, потому что, что я вообще знаю?

Счастье, несчастье, деньги, дорога, любовь.

Hi, everyone.

Actually, I am not in such a good mood as during my winter holidays.

I had an Olympiad this weekends and as a result I am so tired and exhausted.

I have no desire to study and work hard. I can’t even understand, why I am doing it, because it only takes a lot of time and seemed to me boring and useless. I am talking about such subjects as Biology Chemistry or Physics, for example. All teachers are trying to give us more and more homework, that only make us robots. We don’t have enough free time and thoughts about freedom or happiness.

So, this is all my feelings now. I believe, that I will overcome these hardships and my life will be full of bright moments!

Here are a number of reasons why folks purchase the best spas gift card for other people to celebrate exceptional events. For starters, there are cards available to invest at all kinds of businesses. Alternately, gift-givers may also buy debit gift cards which may be used in just about any kind of business. Simply speaking, the gift-giver has tons of alternatives. Discover some other explanations for why these cards are popular with gift-givers!

Someone could purchase the best spas gift cards which are worth any quantity of money. Another individual might purchase a $100 card to his parents in their wedding anniversary. Normally, shops, restaurants and other companies sell these cards even quantities of cash so the trade is as straightforward as you can.

Pick a Spa Gift Card together with the Present Recipient in Mind

Lots of folks enjoy giving those cards as presents since they can select one which allows a friend or relative to see a place they enjoy. For example, a 100 card which goes to a buddy's favourite day spa would offer her the chance to treat herself for a day of pampering. A spouse may give her husband a card which belongs to his favourite steak restaurant . He will be delighted with the possibility of enjoying a tasty meal without needing to cover it!

Unlike other gifts, a card into a favourite eatery or store does not have to be decorated with intricate wrap paper or maybe a decoration. Most stores and restaurants decorate their cards using the title of the company and an appealing layout. There's absolutely no demand for a gift-giver to invest additional cash on decorative information.

Some gift-givers appreciate how these spas gift cards do not need to be used straight away. The gift recipient gets to think of what they need for many days or maybe a couple of months. On the flip side, the receiver is free to devote the card straight away if he or she favors. Most cards contain specific details about use. Lots of cards never expire and some do not charge any fees in the event the card is not used within a particular quantity of time. The receiver of a card may use it in her or his leisure.

Online or In-Store

Gift-givers adore these cards since they may frequently be utilized for both online store purchases. This is just another element of advantage added to a thoughtful present. It is a simple procedure for a individual to devote their card online in a shop or a different business enterprise.

In the end, those who purchase the best spas gift cards for loved ones are receiving them something that they will surely use and appreciate. If the card belongs to a favourite company, the individual will be anxious to escape and devote this generous gift! No need to stress yourself thinking of what kind of gift should you give, for there are the the est spas gift card that is always beneficial and great to be given as a gift.

Regardless of, every household has a kitchen area, however, a lot of them do unknown just what kind of cooking area they come from, thus the need for kitchen lighting design. Have you ever before categorized your cooking area? What sort of cooking area you have? Is it a rustic or nation design? Where design you wish to transform it, nation to modern or rustic to a streamlined modern-day cooking area? Someone like the elimination of all additional devices develops their cooking area to transform it into a minimal cooking area.

Kitchen Lighting Design

So, it is a reality that you need to understand about the kitchen lighting design you intend to make right into your kitchen area improvement. Whatever it might be, you have to maintain compared to factor in your mind that the cooking area is the only room where we invest one of the most beneficial time of our life. In contemporary idea, kitchen area is not just an office of preparing food. It is utilized as an analysis space; playing video games with your children or talking with your close friends also for organizing an event in the weekend break. In this perspective, you have to think of the enhancement of design as well as additional worth included products in a kitchen area along with the regular daily-useable devices.

Creative thinking continues to be behind each of this revaluation, as well as an important part of that imagination results illumination in an appropriate reliable preparation. The correct illumination style depends upon the design of your cooking area and also on your individual psychology.

There is a huge range of illumination components for the cooking area beginning with the island lights, necklaces, light fixtures, track lights, recessed lights as well as under cupboard lights. It is not that you will certainly be taken into consideration as a great developer if you make use of all type of lights her as well as inside the cooking area. Every design of illumination has its personality and also worth. A few setups of lights often functions far better compared to a lavish setup of all pricey lights. Success is restricted in the preparation.

In the beginning, you need to separate the parts of the cooking area inning accordance with the sort of job. The workplace for preparing food is fairly various in capability as well as the value of the space of your kitchen area where you normally do some crucial documents or check out publications. Every component needs to be lit up by its very own relevance and also different interest is necessary to be attracted to each and every location. This sort of differential lights is called accent lights.

For instance, if you wish to place a unique focus on a stunning huge paint or other artwork that is held on the wall surface or if you place some unique recipes planned for your family members to offer a shock on the table, you require a type of recessed cooking area lighting fixture or straight mounted lights for that. Those lights can be guided by a certain item and also placed added accent relative to various other things.

Under closet, illumination is an additional design of lighting to produce a fantastic destination on the counter leading location which every proprietor prefers to concentrate on optimum. These lights are most cost-effective as well as are really soft as well as reduced. You could have numerous attractive under cupboard lighting fixture within seventy-eighty bucks. Usage most modern-day backsplash ceramic tiles with matching shade as well as structure inning accordance with your selection as well as the motif of the cooking area to include a unique worth of destination. Usage dimmer buttons to regulate the illumination and also the state of mind of cooking area at the various time as well as in various demand.

You can have customized NDIS children services that come to your house. Traveling to meet with your therapist, trying hard to beat traffic and rushing to meet up with appointments can all be avoided when you have child occupational services delivered at home. Another advantage for this is the comfort of the child. Learning in their own environment is less stressful and has higher impact on their development results. The option of NDIS youth therapy at home is overall more practical and convenient. Some service providers work flexible hours, don’t charge extra for coming and can deal with your busy schedule just fine. If you need child therapy sessions on weekends or holidays, you can rely on such services to cover you.

Why occupational therapy for NDIS kids?

Occupational therapists for children will help them develop significant areas to help accomplish more activities. Children’s NDIS therapy will help:

• Grow a structure for their future

• Improve their ability for self-care and capacity for independence

• Improve their ability to participate and interact with other kids and the surrounding community.

Services rendered

• Special equipment needs assessment: if your child has been diagnosed with a disability after an accident or illness, they will need time to be accustomed to any special equipment needed for their new lives. NDIS kids can help teach these children how to operate equipment like hearing aids, wheelchairs and splints.

• Self-care and independence: due to some physical or mental impairments and disabilities, some children have a problem with normal self care and independent routines like feeding, toileting, dressing up and bathing. NDIS for youth can help teach them these skills for the future.

• Developing fine motor skills: skills like writing or using cutlery can be affected by certain disabilities. Having a therapist to handle such lessons with your child can make a world of difference in their quality of life.

• Developing gross motor skills: skills like jumping and running are very important in the life of any child. Children with disabilities might have problems with these skills and need help from NDIS teenager specialist to overcome their barriers.

• Developing social skills: social skills are very important, even for children. Your child should learn how to mix up with other children, so they don’t stick out as socially awkward. NDIS child therapy is a good way to get this done.

• Travel training: your children with disability will still take trips like normal children. Since their needs are different, they might need special training for this too and a therapist can help.

Children with mental or physical disabilities can be a challenge to teach. NDIS children services are available for their development but you can choose more flexible options that will be there for you every time you need them.

Summary

Having your therapist come to you is convenient, practical and has a more positive impact on the child since they get to learn in a familiar environment.